Posts Tagged ‘Tattoo’
They Said No Names
I’ve heard it over and over again.
“You should never get the names of wives or girlfriends tattooed on your body.”
Well to hell with that. I got my wife’s name tattooed on my arm. My tattoo artist asked me if I was sure. I slid my eyes his way shot him a scowl and blurted:
“I ride and die for her, this is my bitch”, as I throw up nondescript hand signals trying to look as tough as possible, but not succeeding.
When I got married, I swore that I was only getting married once, divorce is a no no. I love her, and I hope we stay together longer than the tattoo stays on me. If that makes any sense.
Yes I have to admit it, I’m a hater. I hate all of the world and some things more than others. I’m such a hater that I’ve decided to make a list of some of the things I hate.
- I hate people who are always feeling ‘Awkward’ , Fuck You
- I hate people who are always Outraged, guess what Fuck You too.
- I hate people who read blogs and leave comments about punctuation errors, your a Cunt.
Lets do away with the “I hate people” part and we’ll just assume I hate the following
- Liberals, you liberal assholes.
- Conservatives, you narrow minded pricks
- Libertarians, racist Douchbags
- People oversensitive about race, my motto is “There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers. Here you are all equally worthless. “, real talk
- Who look down when they walk.
- Grotesquely Obese people, do something you lazy fat fuck.
- People with two tattoo’s on their shoulder and say its the beginning of a sleeve, no its not your a poser prick.
- People who ask “How is that tattoo going to look like when your 60″, probably as wrinkly as my dick.
- People who chant “Si se puede”, like its some type of policy statement, give me a plan.
- People who wear any Christian Audigier Clothing line, you Douchbag.
This is just a short list of the kinds of people I hate. Trust me it will get longer every day I find a new type of person to hate on. Its kind of fun since every rap song these days are going on and on about haters. I thought I would reveal my true political position.
Its about time I got tatted again.
Why, there’s a lot of space to cover before I die. I would like to cover my chest, stomach, and back by the time I’m 40.
I could of been much farther along now but I’m so damn finneky. I just don’t want anyone to put work on me, for real. I do like my work to be gourmet, I’m not going to front. I can’t just get some no name clowns work on me. Its the truth. When someone asks me “Who did that”, it would be nice if they could actually recognize the name.
There are far too many tattoo artists out there anyway. Shit there are too many artists out there for that matter. Most of the art I see in gallery’s anyway isn’t much better than the shit I see on Venice Beach on sale for $20.
As a tattooed person, I walk around all day mumbling “I hate tattoos”, because of all the garbage I see on people. Now the question is who do I want to get work from. Here is my list.
Marco has done most of my work to this date, but he’s a busy man and its always good to get work from a few artists. Jose Lopez, Chris Brand and Jun Cha all have an old school Chicano single needle style that is very LA. This is how I want my body suit to look.
When it comes to tattoo’s I’m not concerned with each individual piece I’m more interested in how my full body asthetic will look. Nothing looks worst than someone in half tribal and half New School, yuck. I want to have one asthetic.
But first I need the money.
While meandering about the internet, I’ve run across this prime example of Tribal Tattoo Douchbaggery. Guys like this give tribal tattoo’s a bad name. I can just imagine what he said when he went into the tattoo shop. “Dude I want a tribal style tattoo, big Dude, I mean BIG” and that is just what he got. I wonder if the tattoo came with the pretty young woman. Stuff like this makes me murmur “I hate Tattoos”.
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| From Tattoo |
This was the first time that someone has done a freehand tattoo on me. He just looked at the picture picked up his sharpie and started to draw away.
To be honest it was a scary experience, but I think that the result was quite good. My only critique is I’m already brown, there was no need for interior shading, but I love it none the less.
Finally I have an appointment for this Thursday. I’ve been trying to get an appointment for the past few weeks.
Lets get this straight, I think people who have a deep drive and desire to cover their whole body with tattoos are weirdo’s.
Yea I said it!!
Heavy tattoo collectors and most tattoo artists are weirdos. Face it homeboy there is something wrong with you if you want to cover most of your body with images, especially if its on your face, neck and top of the hands.
I’m not saying this is a bad thing, well I just about have dual sleeves and I’m scheming on finishing my chest and starting my back, but I admit that I’m a weirdo. Don’t get me wrong I’m not just pulling this out of this air, I’m pulling this information from out of my ass where it has fermented for long enough.
Sometimes the pursuit of being heavily tattooed is a psychosis. I admit it, I’m part of this psychosis. My wife thinks that i’m crazy, because one of my favorite phrases is “I hate tattoos”, and I do, I say that whenever I see a complete douche with a complete douche tattoo.
What are complete douche tattoo’s.
- A single literary phrase on your forearm. (Fucker man up)
- A male with a tramp stamp (Stop being a bitch)
- Full black bands on arms or legs (Think before you ink fuck face)
- Who’s only tattoo is a super small little flower. (step your tat game up)
example of a douche tattoo:
Why do I hate them, well like anything of great importance in my life, there is a “love/hate” relationship I have with it, tattoo’s are no different.
On one hand I love tattoo’s. I love tattoo culture, it reminds me of the street. It reminds me of a culture of people who don’t care what your history is, they only care of what type of person you are. It makes me think of people who aren’t trapped in the cubicle farm and if they are they wan’t to get out as soon as possible.
While Tupac was the first person that made me really say, “Damn I want to be Tatted”, it was Travis Barker who really made me start the process of getting tattooed. He was being interviewed somewhere and they asked him about his tattoo’s, he told them that he got the majority of his tattoos well before he became rich and famous from Blink 182, because with all those tattoo’s he had to make it big, he had no choice.
But I digress, what am I going to get this Thursday, you know how I do I love cliche shit.
So I decided to get my own cliche douch tattoo. I love tattoo’s.
Productivity for me comes in ebbs and flows. Sometimes I’m a gushing well of productivity then at other times for weeks on end I’m just a slovenly mess. This feels like its going to be a good week.
Whats on this amazing agenda of mine? Well not much really, wanna hear it here it goes.
- Transcribe Miya Bailey Interview for Needles and Sins
- Keep redesigning this website.
- Get my Super Secret project back on track
Yea you got that I have a Super Secret project in the works. This Super Secret Project involves a few things. I’m going to give you some hints it involves:
- Film
- Black People
- Tattoo’s
The rest is for your imagination. When I debut it God willing it will help me break away from these Golden, Health Insurance Guaranteed, Retirement bound handcuffs I’ve had on for the past 10 years.
We can all dream can’t we.
Its about time I got on the ball with this one. I’ve only been trying to maximize the the daylight hours for the past 34 years, maybe one day I’ll get this one together.
It always seems like I have a million things to do but, rest assured I will find time to chill in the house and lounge like I had nothing better to do. What has been helping me has been lists. Lets see how it goes.
Things To Do Tonight
- update www.marcocerretelli.com
- write book review of Bodies of Inscription
- Put together packet for Jacci Gresham
- Scan Tax Documents
Things To Do This Week
- Work on Tattoo History monolouge
- Badger Tattoo Artists for project
- Badger Dermatologists for project
What is this project you might ask, well I will tell you that it involves tattoo’s and it involves history and it involves me, thats all you get buddy.
Time Management isn’t the only thing I have to get a full grip on. The other thing If have to get together is the concept of “having and not having”. You know what I mean, its a basic concept. First you have something, its in your hand and you can use it. Then you don’t have it, it is gone and no longer accessible. Me I haven’t been able to master this concept, because I always tend to lose things. Which ultimately means I have had the thing now, I don’t have it. Thus my inability to fully grasp the concept of having and not having.
Technology seems to be failing me as of late. My cell phone has the worst buzz on it and I can’t seem to acquire a new phone without spending $400. This is the last time I will waive the cell phone insurance, If your not up for an upgrade then the price of a cell phone is officially your first born.
I just needed to rant, back to our regularly scheduled broadcast.
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